Thursday, April 17, 2008
I went ahead and did it. I told my students I would not be back next year. It's so sad to see kids come back to see teachers who have transferred, retired (or been let go...) as they walk into their former classrooms during the first week of the new year, fully expecting a hug from that teacher--and she's not there! It's just awful. I don't want my kids to have to deal with that. So--I told them.
It was difficult, but not as difficult as I'd expected, because of their reaction. I told my homeroom after lunch and then the afternoon homeroom at the end of the day. I explained that I was helping run my husband's books for his business and that my daughter and I were starting our own business. One student in each homeroom asked, "What kind of business?". I asked, "What kind do you think?"
A few of the kids named some random businesses--dog grooming, school supply store, nail salon (have they ever even seen my nails painted?)--but a good dozen or more of them YELLED, "A scrapbook store!" In both classes, separately. Pretty funny. So they do know me well. That's reassuring, considering many of them lately have been acting as though we've never even met...
At this point, time is dragging on, but I still seem to be in a rush to get everything finished. Is that possible? I have a classroom that has to be cleaned out, a school year to complete, a teenager set to graduate, a store to establish and furnish, and a house that looks like gypsies just moved out of it. And I get so excited every day when new product arrives, like it's Christmas. I spend a WHOLE lot of time just gazing at the yumminess that comes in those brown boxes...
Here are the fine lines I am walking...staying busy but being patient, stocking the store well but trying to be a good steward of the money, fulfilling new obligations but not neglecting old ones. And the whole time struggling to find time to sleep just enough hours to keep me going. I feel like that old joke--I just flew in from Chicago, and boy are my arms tired!
But every time I get a little weary, I'm reminded by some little something--like two groups of children whom I love, spontaneously shouting about a scrapbook store--that God's hand is on me, continuing to lead me on this journey.
And I'm once again awed and humbled and surprised at where God is taking my life.
"But they that wait upon the LORD
shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings as eagles
they shall run, and not be weary;
and they shall walk, and not faint."
"Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God:
I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee
with the right hand of my righteousness."